"Self of steam"
This blog entry was inspired by my experiences with spoiled American teenagers who think their life is so very hard and complicated. There are surprisingly few American teenagers who actually act content with their lives. So few that it almost seems that the easier people's lives are the more unhappy they are. You hardly ever hear about a kid from Africa bitching on and on about social pressures.
In this blog entry I'm going to talk about something that I heard spoiled American teenagers (I will further refer to them as SATs) say a lot. How many times have you heard an SAT whine about having "low self-esteem"? I know I've heard that way too many times. "Ooooo, poor me, the society's so cruel to me, it's making my self-esteem low!". Usually statements like that very clearly lack any kind of factual basis. But even if the SAT's self-esteem WAS low, would it be possible for the SAT to determine it. The basic question I'm going to try to answer in this blog is, "Is it possible for a person to know whether their self-esteem is high or low?"
Self-esteem is basically your estimate of what you're worth. To say you have low self-esteem is to say you're worth more than you think you're worth. But it's absolutely absurd to say you think you're worth more than you think you're worth. It's just not something that a person can determine. It makes some sense for a person to attempt to measure someone else's self-esteem, because it does make some sense to say "I think he's worth more than he thinks he's worth."
Now if you say what I just typed to an SAT, you might hear them say something along the lines of "well, other people have told me my self esteem was low." Unfortunately for the SAT, it still makes no sense to say him/her self-esteem is low. Believing a person who tells you your self-esteem is low is equivalent to instantly acknowledging you're worth more.
So really, as far as each one of us is concerned our self-esteem is normal. Saying your self-esteem is low is trying to trick people into thinking you're actually worth more than you give yourself credit for. How pathetic is that!
Comments
I didn't quite get the argument. I understand that saying you have low self esteem is giving yourself less credit than you're worth, but kids with low self esteem don't even believe they're worth the little credit they DO give themselves. They always think that whatever it is they do in life is not that important, influential or helpful.
I do agree that American kids think they have a tough life because of societal pressure, but they're usually young and stupid, not knowing that the solution to dealing with societal pressure is just to not care about it.
Posted by: Joe "PM4L" Showers | December 3, 2006 08:36 AM
I think you are partially right. A person saying that they have low self-esteem or low self-confidence is more like them giving an excuse for the way their subjective emotions affect their behavior. It would be more accurate for them to say for instance, “Because I feel badly about myself, I will or won't do such-and-such” This is separate from feeling badly about yourself, which is an emotion, and since emotions are irrational and cannot be controlled, it is a statement of fact.
Feeling badly about yourself is a natural disadvantage, regardless of how well you handle your reactions to negative emotions, so perhaps a more important question should be, “Why do US teenagers feel so badly about themselves?” There are probably about 1,000 good answers to that question.
Posted by: Seth Kingsley | December 3, 2006 01:06 PM
I agree being an american teen that isn't spoiled I have an outisde perspective. If only they could take a step back look at the bigger picture and see what is really happening in our world than most likely they'd stop complaining and realize how fortunate they are to live where they are.
Posted by: Chris Merra | December 3, 2006 04:58 PM
I can't believe I never looked it up before... So yea, I looked up self-esteem... and YOU are the one with the wrong definition of it! You always say that self-esteem is the measurement of your worth... but these definitions say that self-esteem is seeing yourself as worthy. 1. a realistic respect for or favorable impression of oneself; self-respect.
2. an inordinately or exaggeratedly favorable impression of oneself. 1. a feeling of pride in yourself
2. the quality of being worthy of esteem or respect
Someone with low self-esteem just doesn't seem themselves as valuable, no matter if they really are or not.
Posted by: Lindsay | December 3, 2006 05:47 PM
I think when you are more concerned about your safety, or where your next meal is going to come from you don't have time to think about your self-worth. Most Americans have it so easy and have so much free time that they spend it worrying about their self-esteem.
Posted by: David | December 10, 2006 11:29 AM
I think when you are more concerned about your safety, or where your next meal is going to come from you don't have time to think about your self-worth. Most Americans have it so easy and have so much free time that they spend it worrying about their self-esteem.
Posted by: David | December 10, 2006 11:29 AM
ha ha ha, well said!
Posted by: edfred | January 22, 2007 11:05 PM